Decompress

Something that was not a new year's resolution, but seems to have been born about the same time, is an overwhelming need to be in control of my emotions. I feel like I've spent a good portion of my life letting people and situations govern how I feel, and though it's easy to sit back and be an emotional wreck (because they'll never think what they should about you) I've had enough. I've been trying to reflect on the way I feel and why, and it's working. "Yeah this really annoying thing happened, and it's a big inconvenience, yes you're right for being upset even though there's nothing you can do about it, but don't dwell on it because you're going to waste time and spend even more time dealing with it, just get it done with and move on."

Unfortunately most negative things in my life are coming from work. I'm not going to go into it on a public blog, but things at work are weird and really putting my practical optimism to the test. I'm not on anyones shit list (as far as I know, eep!), and I know all this stuff will be packed up with a nice bow on the top in the end. Some days it's hard though, I feel like I try really hard to make progress, but there's always more to do, and understandably management expects it all to get done. I strive for a high level of performance, but I think that it's very important to take time for yourself and to forget about work on the weekends.

If I keep typing about this I'll probably end up divulging some secret or opinion that shouldn't be known. I'll end on a happy note though: I promise, to myself, that I will do my best to choose my emotions. Things can be stressful and dramatic, but allowing yourself to let go allows you to be happy and approach the situation from a calm perspective.

Man, I need to get more art on this blog!